My Daughters

My life hasn’t always been easy, but no one said that life was going to be. Regardless of all the trials and tribulations, my family and I have been through, but when I heard about cancer, I didn’t know what to do. Honestly, I really couldn’t cry because it was hard to believe, but when all my aunts talked to me about it, I have come to the realization that it’s just another chapter in our lives not the end of the novel. At the beginning, I was hardly there in the hospital because I was trying to find a way to deal with the fact that my mother was terminally ill. I think what hurt the most was the fact that I’m planning to get married and start a life and I want her to be there and to even think she wouldn’t, it’s like my heart broke over and over and over again. People told me to have faith she will be fine. Really, reality sinks in after a while and the word most commonly associated with cancer is death. How was I supposed to have faith when God has taken several people away from me already? Then a few days turned into weeks and I started realizing that things happen for a reason. I was in the hospital with my mom every day in Manhasset and stood there for a few nights as well. It was the hardest thing to see my mother struggle with sleep and her eating habits. She would even forget certain things until one night my fiancée and I decided to sleep over and keep my mother company. She was fighting her sleep. She was telling me “they took away my way to pray, they don’t want me to pray, they don’t want me to sleep.” She was complaining about her leg hurting and neck cramping. Earlier that day she told me about a woman that came by to give her anointing oil. So I got the oil, her orange basin and put some oil in it with hot water. I took a washcloth and started to wipe her body and at 5:28 am she finally fell asleep as I prayed and wiped her down. I knew then, that God was there helping my mother overcome this obstacle in her life. Later on during the week, the doctors would come in and give us nothing but good news. She had just started her physical therapy there at the hospital and she was moving right along little by little. I saw a miracle before my eyes. I see now what everyone has been talking about. I’m so blessed having a mother like her. We didn’t see eye to eye on many things, but when God throws you these curve balls and you stay close as if nothing has ever gone wrong, that’s what family is all about. I love my mother to death and I’m glad I have been by her side. Just a message to all those young folks out there: Don’t ever, ever take your mother or father for granted. You are not promised tomorrow and neither are your parents. Respect them and love them. We aren’t perfect and we all make mistakes, but the biggest mistake is not forgiving. And to everyone that has called, emailed me, messaged me on myspace and facebook, the countless text messages and instant messages; Thank you so much for your kind words and support. It means a lot to me. I’m so happy that my family has touched your lives in such a positive way. Stay Blessed, Stay True, Your Friend JOZILYN aka JOZY
I haven’t shared words on this site until now. Ever since my mother was diagnosed with Cancer, things got out of whack. From my actions to words nothing was right. I did things I shouldn’t have done but you live and learn. I can’t sugar coat anything because it already happened and I can’t change the past, but I did learn from my mistakes.I don’t EVER blame anyone for my mother being sick because things happen for a reason. My mother being sick actually was like a slap in my face. Made me not take advantage of my parents, sibling and the others I truly love. I do truly love my mother with all my heart even though I did my dirt, I can admit to that. At times it showed, but that wasn’t my intentions at all. But as always it comes off differently. It’s been 6 months and now things are falling into place, really falling into place. I live in Connecticut with my father and go to a great high school in East Hartford, EHHS. I am passing my classes with decent grades and looking forward to graduating early ( January 2012 ) and applying for Cornell University, John Jay and NYU those are my goals and looking forward to them. So I can see my mother often in Florida. I hope it is sooner than later. As much as I miss my sister; Jozilyn, ” friend” Jose, best friend Jamia and my cousins. Being out in CT has truly put me at peace. I know they will always be there for me but I have to look out for myself. Dealing with my mother’s cancer has truly put a toll on me but I am learning how to deal with it. It hurts so much that I am away from my mother, it really does. I am HOMESICK without my mother. But I do know she loves me and my sister and at a great place, in my Aunt Mary’s care. My mother is strong, trust when I say that she is strong. She Can Do It! Yes, She Can! Te amo mucho, Mommy.
Be sure to make time for special moments with those you love.
Jozy & Dee have no idea how much happiness they truly bring.
They have brightened up my days with their smiles and their silliness. 
They help me to remember all the blessings that I have.
Sometimes they can be willful. They try their very hardest to please and do what's right. 
Every person that has known them sees a light within their soul. 
They'll squeeze away the sorrow and make me forget about my pain. 
They give the greatest hugs from morning until night.
They are my sunshine that won't end and as they have grown 
they have become my closest friend.  

And when at night I finally say my prayers I Thank Him for my angel, 
and ask for him to always keep...A watchful eye and hand to protect her from this world. 
My beautiful daughters, I was blessed with two of you, 
You will never know how proud I am of all the things you both do. 
You are the reason I will always try my best.
I have watched you both throughout the years, laugh, cry and grow... 
I just can't imagine, a day of my life without you...
Because you're a part of me and my love for you is so true. 
So just remember, no matter how old you are or where you may be...
There's someone who needs you and loves you and that someone is MOM
When times seem too hard to bear & I l feel like giving up
I vision your beautiful face and the twinkle of your eyes 
The bond we created is a mother and daughter bond that can never be torn
With the strength and guidance of God and the blessings he pours down from above 
I want to be the best mom I can be to you and
embrace you with all my love You are as precious as a flower and as gorgeous as a rose 
You are brighter than any star in the sky every time you smile
 I want you to be proud of who you are Put forth your efforts to achieve your goals 
and let God do the rest
Your are the most precious gift, that I've ever been given
I Love You, Mom
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One Response to My Daughters

  1. Clara Rivera says:

    Today my heart is heavy had no idea that my childhood friend had passed ! Sitting here in shock …. LORD BLESS HER GIRLS AND SISTERS ALWAYS AMEN . 9178730580 if you wish to speak with me

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